Mission

MomPIC2

The biggest challenges that most parents face are their teens hurting, troubled or in crisis.  Cutting, depression, suicidal tendencies, abandonment, rejection, low self-esteem, self-harm, adoption issues and addictions are many of the issues that teens are dealing with. Having raised and still raising teens, I have been through the gamut of some of these crises.

I have also found that not many parents want to talk about their teen’s issues due to shame and embarrassment.  Not wanting to continue in our struggles, I chose to seek help.  I learned that it was easier to talk about what I was going through and share the pain as a hurting parent than to hold it inside and be alone.  It was also important for me to understand my broken and hurting teen.  We have come a long way and have learned so much.  Now it is time to pass on that wisdom and knowledge that I have learned onto other parents.

My goal is that everyone that reads this blog would be encouraged and see a ray of hope in the midst of their difficult journey. Although I am not a writer, I do feel led by God to share my stories from my heart so that others can find help and encouragement too. I would also like to acknowledge some very valuable and important people who have made a large impact in our family – Dr. Nancy Gearhart (Psychologist), Dr. Julie Wegyrn  (Psychologist and Counselor), Dr. Frank A. Vassallo (Child & Adolescent Psychiatry) and Cynthia Griffin (Counselor).

The blog is called Anchor of Promise because Jesus has been my anchor through all these trials that I have gone through with my daughters.  He has promised me through His Word that I will not be forsaken and He will provide me the strength, hope and answers to our family’s troubles.  Jeremiah 29:11 says,For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Stacy Lee

 

Please note:  I am not a licensed mental health care worker.  As a parent, I will encourage you, give you resources, share my experiences and pray for you.  I would highly recommend that you find help from someone in the mental health field for any type of counsel you may need for your teen and family.  God bless you.

24 thoughts on “Mission

  1. Thank you for following my blog. Although I no longer have teens in my home, as a priest your input on this site keeps me tuned in. I look forward to reading more.

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    • Thank you for following me. I would love to know your input regarding different topics. My biggest concern with hurting and broken families is that when the issues are serious, many churches do not have the tools or knowledge on how to minister to these families and in the end, they find themselves even more hurt and broken. I realize that churches are filled with broken people, but if we don’t know how to give healing counsel, guidance and support, then the Church would be helpless in helping anyone.

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      • Yes, I agree. Many churches are not equipped to handle the depth of some of the hurting and brokenness that occurs in families. In the areas of serious issues, I believe healing is a ministry that benefits collectively from spiritual, intellectual and emotional support. Speaking for myself, I am trained in Spiritual relationship with the Divine. However, a small church as mine does not have a lot of external resources. So it is important to recognize behaviors or issues that are beyond my area of knowledge and encourage people to get help as I continue to guide from a Spiritual standpoint. Thank you. I appreciate your inquiry. Continued peace and blessings.

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      • Thank you for your input. It is greatly appreciated and yes, I agree with you on many levels. At least that is the experience that I have run into as a parent of teenagers who struggled on many different issues.

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  2. You have been through a great deal but are very wise and strong! God bless you and bring you great joy!

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    • Thank you! It is only by God’s grace that has brought our family through the struggles and trials. And it is His calling that we take what we learned and use it for His glory so that others can be encouraged and helped. God bless!

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  3. Looking forward to reading more from your blog. I’m a mom/step mom to two teens and 12 year old. We’ve weathered our share of storms, with more to come. I’ve started blogging too- visit me at http://www.backwardparentingbybrita.com!

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    • Great to have a fellow comrade in the ranks of raising teens. It’s tough raising teens, especially in this society and then add any kind of complex issues that they are dealing with, just added some gray hairs on your head. 🙂 Looking forward to reading more of your posts.

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  4. Hi Stacy,
    Thanks for the follow and for your encouragement. Now it’s my turn to share some encouragement: you have a great ministry in this blog. Thanks for sharing from your heart so other moms won’t feel alone.
    I love “Anchor of Promise” and your message that, “Jesus has been my anchor through all these trials that I have gone through with my daughters. He has promised me through His Word that I will not be forsaken and He will provide me the strength, hope and answers to our family’s troubles.” Amen!

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    • Thank you Vicki! I am in the midst of writing a book about my adventures of raising teens in crisis and the stories of other parents who have also traveled that road that led to discouragement and shame. By giving my voice, I want others to have hope, redemption and knowledge that our answer can only be found through our Lord Jesus Christ.

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  5. Been down this path myself. Whoa….what a rollercoaster ride. I pray you can be there for people because it’s a painful, scary ride! To have information from someone who knows the pain will be a blessing. God bless you!!!

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    • Thank you for your words of encouragement. Since you have been down this road, are you speaking from a parent’s perspective or as a once upon a time teen in crisis? And because of that experience, what advice could you give other parents?

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      • I’ve been through both sides. I was a suicidal teen. I didn’t act out but I was very depressed. I got no help and suffered emotionally. It lasted until my 30’s until I got a break through. Back in the 60”s mental health issues were an embarrassment to families.

        My last of 6 children was adopted and she did everything a troubled teen could do… got in lots of trouble, cutting, depression etc. I was there for her 24/7. I got her counseling when she was a child and throughout the teen years, high school for trouble children, medication and so on. When she was a teen she self medicated with street drugs. At 18 she got into trouble with the law and spiraled down.

        I taught her well and she got lots of love from many people and was in church, was taught good morals and everything. She had a great childhood….but she had her own set of emotional problems. When she was 18 I had to let her go. It was nothing we could do at that point except…pray….and we did.

        I was there for her for all her court appearances and other troubles. Eventually she got tired of her life and decided to do what she knew was right. She joined job corp. and has been there for one and a half years. It’s been hard for her. She asked for counseling and is getting that and anger management too. She has been very angry for no good reason.

        She is still struggling but trying hard to help herself and grow up. I believe her problems are biological because her biological mother did the exact same thing. I got my daughter when she was only 9 weeks old. Even so she still grew up with her biological mom’s same problems.

        I feel these types of things have to be played out. You try all you can to help some children out but they just can’t change despite all the help. BUT… I believe the important thing to do is teach them correct things to do and be brave when raising them. My daughter got into trouble with me when she did wrong. She was punished, talked to and she did not get away with stuff.

        Also my husband and I and her older siblings showed her how to live right from our good examples. You can’t expect your troubled kids to do right when they see you doing wrong.

        Get them as much professional help as possible. Do your research or join a on-line group and educate yourself. Be consistent in all your correction and discipline. Lastly….You betta learn how to pray and have faith…because you’re gonna need to do a great deal of praying. Hang in there!

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      • First of all, I want to say thank you for sharing your story as painful as it was. My heart goes out to you and your family. Yes, we can do all the things the right way and our children can still (choose) to go the opposite way. There is nothing more, especially once they have reached adulthood, that we can do except to pray for God’s intervention. Some of the things you spoke of reminded me that generational issues are involved. I would encourage you to study and look into Generational Healing. This has been very imperative to the healing process of my own daughter whose background involved witchcraft and fortune telling. The demonic stronghold throughout her origins is powerful and we had to learn how to break that. I would highly recommend searching on ChristianBook.com and type in Generational Healing. They have some really good books on it. Because of going down that road I have seen many good changes in my own daughter’s life, freed from that bondage. She too, being adopted, carried a lot of anger and depression. She is in a different place now, but every once in a while the depression tries to creep back in. I have used vitamins B6 and B12 which are really good for depression and I have gotten her outdoors doing physical things which apparently boosts your immune system and hormone system to a better level. Hormones is also another area (chemical imbalance) that can cause a lot of issues with depression. In the meantime, I would use spiritual warfare in praying and generational healing prayer. Please keep me updated and I will also add her to my prayer list. God bless you!

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  6. Dear sister Stacy,
    I thank you so much for following my blog. It was such an honor for me. Well, I so blessed could met you here in WordPress. I will become a young mother for 2 months later, and the time will come my son become a teen. I do believe that I could learn so,so many things about teens from you great blog which really concern about teens. Thank you and Many blessings to you.

    Karina

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    • Thank you Karina. That was so sweet of you to share from your heart. I also look to be encouraged and to learn from others. It is good to bless others and to be blessed. God bless you.

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  7. Hi there! Thanks for following http://www.christiancounselorpastor.wordpress.com I am glad the blog ministered to you and look forward to your return visits and comments.

    Blessings on being there for parents of troubled teens. Care givers need lifelines like yours so that they truly know they are not alone in their challenges and struggles.

    In His amazing love,
    Pastor Sharon

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    • Thank you Pastor Sharon. I too, look forward to reading your blog. I may even contact you in regards to some of the topics that I cover to get some perspective from a pastoral view. This is something I am researching as to the involvement, understanding and support of leadership with families who are broken and in crisis.

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      • I read some of the comments on your blog about spiritual leaders being supportive of families in crisis, and I have to agree that many don’t know how to help. It takes following God’s lead plus skill sets, some of which just can’t be taught. The saddest thing I can share with you is that people don’t know how to be there for others long term, be it during a relational (or behavioral) crisis or a prolonged series of challenges due to illness or disability. Unfortunately, this can result in a situation where someone needs support and is abandoned by those he or she turns to at times when they most need it. Reminds me of Jesus in the garden when the disciples fell asleep during His time of need.

        Feel free to contact me as you are led, and I’ll be glad to help in any way I can.

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      • I so appreciate your willingness to help me. I do have some more questions and will touch base with you later. God Bless!

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  8. Stacy:
    Thank you so much for the follow! I enjoyed visiting your site and will come back often! God bless you ~Zoey & Tapestry Treasures Team.

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    • Thanks Zoey! I’ve been so busy that I haven’t been keeping up with my follows and checking out other bloggers till recently. So glad you like the site. I’m hoping to improve it more in the fall. I’m still a newbie when it comes to blogging. 😀 God bless!

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  9. Thanks Stacey for reading my blog and for the ministry you do. I think sometime soon Erinn will be ready to contribute. Starting high school and the trial we have walked through with her sister has been a little overwhelming for her. She is a good girl and loves the Lord, in his timing it will all come together.
    So glad to be connected and serving with all of you at Christian Blessings!

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    • Erinn and I have talked a little bit about those trials and believe me, I know where you are coming from because I have an older daughter as well and you could say still gives us trials.

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