Why I Refused to Celebrate Mother’s Day

Why I Refused To Celebrate Mother's Day - Anchor Of Promise

 

It’s Mother’s Day! Flowers, candy, and a day off from cleaning and cooking. That is what many moms wish for. These are some of the things that a mother enjoys while the day is celebrated.  Some families go all out.  They give lavish retreats away from home, a day at the spa, or give praise through cards, phone calls, and social media to express their love for “Mom”.  

However, being a “mom” of a teen in crisis brings about a very different kind of Mother’s Day.  You see, teens who are hurting and struggling have moms who put themselves last on the list of receiving care.  We also don’t always experience the benefits or rewards of adulation along with hugs and words of love and thankfulness.

Some moms instead, worry about their teen who hadn’t come home the night before.  Some moms are faced with a teen who is drug addicted or self-harming.  Some moms must visit their teen in juvie for Mother’s Day or at the hospital because their teen had a mental breakdown.  Some moms wonder if they can handle being in their child’s life because their teen has left them hopeless, frustrated, angry, and tired from all that they have been through.

Years ago, I made a big deal out of Mother’s Day which got ruined many times because of my teen in crisis.  So I refused to celebrate it.  But as time went on, I became thankful.  Thankful that I survived another year as a mom of a teen in crisis.

As each Mother’s Day passed, my faith in God became stronger as I relied on Him to get me to the following year. This grew and sustained my hope during the difficult times.  It also helped me deal with my expectations in a more positive way.  Instead of waiting to see what was going to ruin my day, I thanked God for all the little victories that were happening in my child’s life.  No matter how small or big.

One of the biggest changes for me as a mom was how much more I put that responsibility as a parent back towards God.  I knew in my heart that I couldn’t control every aspect, problem, issue or circumstance with each crisis, but I did know who could.  That took off a lot of burdens I was carrying as a parent, especially as a mom.

Being a parent, we put so much pressure on ourselves to be the best mom and when our teen fails us or the community in general, it comes back on us.  No longer stuck in this pattern, I give my problems to God in prayer. I know He will work them all out in His own way through His wisdom and not mine.  After all, He created my child from the very beginning.  He knows my teen better than I ever could.

So dear mom, as you get through this Mother’s Day, good or bad, remind yourself that it isn’t forever.  Your teen really does love you and one day they will thank you for not giving up on them.

From one mom to another who understands, may your Mother’s Day be filled with God’s love, hugging you with hope, peace, strength, and the knowledge that the Lord knows your heart this day.  Let Him guide you through the day and the year and allow Him to carry the hurts, disappointments, and the sorrow you may come upon.  As you rely on Him, He will give you joy that passes all understanding and a lightness within you as you daily go before the Lord in prayer.  

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!

This is NOT What I Prayed For

This is NOT What I Prayed For - Anchor Of Promise

 

Have you ever asked God to intervene in your teen’s life at any cost?  Have you ever been desperate enough to give God choices to remedy the crisis?  When the answer came, were you prepared for how God handled it?

When I was in one of those situations, I prayed, by giving God two choices that I asked for thinking those requests would rectify the problem.  However, when the answer came, it was what I had asked, but way more than what I had planned, wanted or could handle.

In fact, the answer that I received was heartbreaking, devastating, scary, painful, and wishing that I had never prayed the prayer that I did.  I don’t think that I had ever cried so much or been so fearful of what was presented to me from that answer. Continue reading

You Are Not Alone

You are not alone - Anchor of Promise

I would like to promote Dena Yohe’s book, “You Are Not Alone” which will be released on July 19th, 2016.    Dena and her husband have been blogging friends that I have come to know and respect for the last several years.  We have often shared our posts with each other so that we could encourage our readers. Our missions are one of the same – to help parents with struggling children who are hurting and in crisis.

Dena understands this so well.  Having a daughter who was suicidal, dealing with mental illness and addiction of self-harm among a plethora of other issues, Dena and her husband prayed for God to help their broken daughter.  God heard those prayers and today their daughter, Renee, is a survivor.

Because of Renee’s past destructive life, her friends started a non-profit organization called, To Write Love On Her Arms. Renee’s life was also portrayed in last year’s 2015 Sony Pictures release by the same name.

To order You Are Not Alone, you can go Hope For Hurting Parents website and find the link on the right of their page to pre-order the book.