Visiting a parent site a few days ago, I noticed quite a few posts from moms sharing their woes in dealing with a rebellious teenage son.
As I was surveying these posts, there was a common thread that weaved through their words. From a mom’s perspective, all she could see was disrespect, no accountability, and not abiding by the rules. Furthermore, fathers were either not present in the family or not fully involved in the family. In many cases, drugs and alcohol became an issue and violence was starting to enter the home.
From the teen’s perspective, he wanted respect, to be heard, and given independence. He was also tired of being treated as a little boy when he was old enough to start making more mature decisions. Moreover, he felt suffocated with little to no opportunity to experience things that were considered acceptable. In fact, in many situations teens became angry and often expressed to their parents how they hated them. Continue reading
As parents of teens who are troubled or in crisis, we often tire and get to a point where we ask, “When does it stop? When will it change? Will my teen ever get better?” Those are the questions that most of us can ask even on a daily basis.
It is heart wrenching to hear your teen lash out in anger and say death is better than life or sit there and hear your teen cry for hours and be inconsolable. What is a parent to do?
I can honestly say, in my own strength I can do nothing. In my own wisdom I will end up failing. In my own control it will end in disaster.
It is only through Christ do I find courage. It is only through Christ that I find guidance. It is only through Christ that He can fix things.
I am not fighting against my teen, but fighting against an enemy that is unseen but is very much there.
For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12 (nlt)
If I allow it, I could lose that war and my teen’s life if I try to do things my own way. I have learned that I cannot do this alone which is what many parents try to do. By fighting that battle alone, all warriors will succumb to weariness and more trouble and no one will have the chance to rise up and win that war. They are stuck in a cycle that only continues the crisis, the hurt, and the pain. Continue reading
On June 3rd of 2013, an angry little 6 yr. old boy from Idaho took off his belt, tied it around the handle of the freezer and hung himself. This was not his first attempt at suicide. Sad to say, this time it was his last because he succeeded. Although he might not have understood the ramifications of his act, he was deliberate in his actions.
The history of this little boy showed major anger issues stemming from the divorce of his parents. Although it is a rare occurrence in children this young, what are not so rare are the many pre-teens and teens that are in similar cases of crisis today. Continue reading
“How did you find out?” was the question. My answer, “You don’t need to know!”
The last thing a parent wants to do is be a spy. But honestly, these days you have to be. Every kind of scary, horrific, brainwashing, addictive and immoral idea sits out there in the cyber space world waiting to kidnap your teen’s mind and alter their life. I don’t know about you but I’m not going to sit there and watch it happen.
My girls have gotten use to me being one up on them. It wasn’t always that way believe me. I had to teach myself what “Checking your History” meant and sad to say, actually becoming a member on sites to just find out information that I knew was going to be harmful to my kid.
I have to laugh because I once got on a site and accidentally hacked someone else’s account. I didn’t realize I had done this until it was too late and I didn’t know how to fix it. But in the end, I got what I wanted which was information of what type of stuff my kid was getting into and I wasn’t very happy. Continue reading
Realizing that she was gone, I sped to my car throwing the keys into the ignition and raced down the street at full speed.
Dressed in black, my car lights were still able to track her down. Slamming the brakes once she was in sight, I threw the car into PARK and swung open the door.
I nearly fell onto the ground as I tried to run after her. Picking up speed I grabbed her arm and pull her towards me. Trying to fight me off, I held more tightly until I was in a deep bear hug.
“I love you! Please, this isn’t the answer. I’m not letting go because you are that important to us. Let’s get through this together.” I said. She broke down crying as I lifted her up and carried her back to the car.
It was going to be another sleepless night as I hid the keys to the house doors. Again I was praying that this would come to an end. Continue reading