One of the biggest frustrations parents have is when their teen/young adult child is unwilling to listen to sound wisdom. Even more frustrating is when your child is in crisis and thinks that their wisdom is more sound than yours.
Teens and young adults are wrapped up in their emotions, feelings, and urgency of the circumstances that surround them. This clouds the consequences of their choices and actions. Continue reading
It’s Mother’s Day! Flowers, candy, and a day off from cleaning and cooking. That is what many moms wish for. These are some of the things that a mother enjoys while the day is celebrated. Some families go all out. They give lavish retreats away from home, a day at the spa, or give praise through cards, phone calls, and social media to express their love for “Mom”.
However, being a “mom” of a teen in crisis brings about a very different kind of Mother’s Day. You see, teens who are hurting and struggling have moms who put themselves last on the list of receiving care. We also don’t always experience the benefits or rewards of adulation along with hugs and words of love and thankfulness. Continue reading
Ian was preparing for school when a behavioral issue popped up and was sent to his room. His emotional capacity was not able to decipher or understand the consequences of what he was about to do next.
Ian took his life at the age of ten. His mother would have never contemplated this chain of events. No parent suspects their child to take their life. Continue reading
When my daughter was nine, she would play on a game called Fantage. It was a cute cartoon game that encouraged fun, imagination, and pretend. They of course had parental controls in which you could oversee your child’s time on the game as well as how much contact they could have with others.
They were good at making sure curse words or any sexual innuendo did not take place. But kids as they are today, find ways to get around that despite how child-like this game is. With little chat bubbles, friends would follow each other around Fantage, playing games, meeting up with new pals, and buying the latest craze at the store with their ecoins.
One day however, a so-called new friend started to meet my daughter in the Fantage cartoon world and requested she go on another chat game without my knowledge. This new chat place had a video chat in which you could see a live person. That day changed my daughter’s life forever. Continue reading
I have met a lot of parents with teens in crisis throughout the years and among them I found four common responses.
When a situation arises and your teen is in crisis, which one of these negative parenting styles are you implementing into your life?
The Denial Parent – Although you love your teen, you think that what they are doing is just a rebellious stage in their life in which they will finally outgrow it and get their life together with time. When you do see the outright dangers and concerns, you hope that it will quickly die down and be fixed on its own by the next day. If someone confronts the situation head on, you retreat and let them know that you are working on it but it is never addressed in the long run. When you cannot deny it any longer, you find many excuses as to why you couldn’t help in the first place. Continue reading