Single Moms with Teens in Crisis – Meet Lynn

 

Single Moms of Teens in Crisis - Meet Lynn - Anchor Of Promise

When we think of “parents with a teen in crisis” we immediately come to the conclusion that mom and dad are involved.  However, there are also thousands of single moms and dads who struggle as parents too.  One such parent is my friend Lynn.  I asked her to share with me some of the difficulties she has endured as a single parent with a teen in crisis. We pray that you will find encouragement through Lynn’s story and that you are not alone in your single parenting journey.

Were you a stay at home mom or working mom when you noticed your daughter’s issues? I am a working mom who works from home and also cared for my mother who had health issues. Both of my daughters now are ages 21 and 23.

Each parent with a child in crisis has a story.  Can you give me a little background of how you became aware that your children were dealing with a serious issue?   While my oldest has had anger and insecurity issues due to a divorce, it is my youngest that has been most concerning.  In her senior year of high school her grades began to drop, she spoke of hating school and had friendships end.  I later came to find out that she was sexually assaulted by a football player who trapped her in his car.  She told no one.  To cope, she began experimenting with drugs.  She chose to attend a city college (which was a good move) but in her second year, I began to see her breakdown emotionally little by little.   At the end of the year, she broke up with her boyfriend of 2 years, told me she was bi-sexual and began living a wild lifestyle.    She went skydiving, had her septum pierced, began losing weight rapidly, out at very late hours of the night, and clearly came home wasted.  My daughters and I are very close, are able to have transparent conversation and purpose time together.  So, not only was I trying to deal with her behavior, she shut me out of her life; I was a roommate of insignificance.  When school started again in the fall, she was having difficulty focusing, and tried working two jobs.  In January, she confessed she felt there was something mentally wrong with her as she began pulling out her hair and cutting herself.   She agreed to go into counseling which lead to a psychiatric diagnosis of bi-polar.  She is on medication and continues seeing her counselor which is helping her work through some core issues. Continue reading

The Phone Call

The Phone Call - Anchor Of Promise

While being busy at home, I received a phone call.  Saying hello several times and not hearing a reply, I listened to see if I could figure out who was calling.  To my surprise it was someone that I knew. They had no idea that their cell phone accidentally automated my phone number.

After yelling in the phone to gain their attention, I quickly realized that my voice was too weak to be heard.  Without being nosy, the sound of a parent’s voice unveiled their struggling crisis.

The parent was telling a family relative how embarrassing it was to have their teen in a mental hospital because they tried to commit suicide.  They used the words “loony bin” and “crazy” to define their teen’s situation.  The relative was compassionate, understanding and supportive but couldn’t supply the answers this single parent needed.

It was obvious that this parent was now in a battle against a mountain of emotions and future decision making.  Not wanting to infringe on someone’s privacy, I chose to not listen any longer and hung up the phone.

My heart sank and I felt so burdened for this parent.  They were grieving in so many ways.   It boggled their mind in questions as to why their teen would even think consider suicide when their large family had so much love to give to this teen.   Continue reading